Found Under the Reference Desk

(OK, maybe it wasn’t THIS dusty, but it was kinda nasty under there….cool photo by Oslo In the Summertime).

Spring cleaning fever has hit the library and we cleaned out the various shelves and cubbies around the Reference Desk.

Besides the chewed pencil stubs (eeew!) and copulating rubberbands (look away!), I also found some old papers from last year’s summer reading club. They were short stories that kids wrote just for the fun of it. So, to lighten the blog mood, I am going to share them with you…

This one has a Seusical quality about it:

Bug in My Mug

There is a bug in my mug! A bug in my mug!   The bug in my mug is blue and I don’t think it has a clue. Maybe it knows me or you!

And an action-drama story:

My Stiches[sic]

One day, I went on a bike ride. And we were riding and riding when we left my Gramas house we got ice crem. I got mint colitcip and an extra scoop. On the ride home grass was on the sidwalk.

I was going vary fast on that sidwalk. I went out of controll. I fall off my bike I crashed too hard. My hands did not come down when I hit the grown. I got 5 booboos and my chin split. I was crying but not hard, but a volunter fire fighter came over and gave me pads for my chin.

I had to go to the hosptol. When I got there I saw more injuries {the original word was erased and rewritten by an adult hand}. One girl was bleeding from her head. It was my turn the nurse was vary nice. Win the doctor came in he said I have to get stiches. It was hard but I got throw it and that was my story and it is true. I realy have stiches on my chin.                                          

And a poem to finish off (in celebration of National Poetry Month!):

                                          High, high, fly

One day I saw a spider fly.

I couldn’t believe my eyes.

Then I saw a dog fly high, high in the sky,

But when I came back they were gone.

And now no one has ever seen then since.

So every leap year,

Check for the spider and dog.

The End.

The BEST part, though, is the coda at the bottom of the page that says:

“Cool facts: This poem was made in 2008. This is a poem that anyone can use at anytime. You can write a poem anywhere. Just use your amagenatin and rhimying.”

🙂

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Sadly, no slapping is allowed at the Reference Desk

Because I wanted to slap some people today.

A nice, solid smack upside the head.

#1: A guy walks up to the Reference Desk (no, this is not the start of a joke…if only it was, people…if only it was…) and asks about a certain movie. He wants to watch Putney Swope. As I am looking it up, he tells me, in his words: “It’s a movie about a black guy who works for this company and he accidentally gets voted in to be the company president. Then, he goes and fires all the white guys and replaces them with all blacks. Yeah, and I guess that will really end up happening in real life soon if Obama is actually elected, huh?”

WTF?! As I am not good at snappy comebacks ( I usually think of something witty to say as they are leaving and getting into their cars), I just stared at him and blinked slowly. I’m thinking he missed the message of this movie.

#2 Our resident old codger stopped in to talk the ear off anyone he can corner. I’d like to feel sorry for the old man but when he starts to loudly recall his old days back when he was a member of the KKK he loses any goodwill from me.

#3 Fruit Bat, as I am now calling crazy computer lady, is off her meds again. Today, she picks me to be her lackey. As I am working at my desk, I hear Fruit Bat shout from across the room: “Hey, hey (snapping fingers)…I need you over here at my computer now!” So, taking my time (I don’t respond well to snapping…), I make my way over there.

She wants me to type in an email address for her. Nope, I won’t do that. Partly because I’ve seen her use the computer every day now for months (sending emails a plenty) and she is perfectly capable of typing this in on her own (and since she claims to be, among other things, a private detective one would think she should be able to master this herself), but mainly because we have a policy that says we don’t do crap like that. I explain this and she then wants me to “confirm” that it is a real email address and guarantee that the email will get there.

I look at what she has written on a scrap of paper and it is complete gibberish. No, I am pretty certain that is not an email address. No, I have never seen an email address that looks like that. But, that’s not acceptable to her because she wrote it down exactly and it can’t be wrong so she says, with an annoyed sigh, “Then go get me the head librarian!” I tell her that he is on the phone but when he is done she is welcome to come to the Reference Desk and talk to him. Then I walk away.

So, for all those mentioned above, this video clip is for you:

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It’s National Library Week: But Don’t Hug the Librarian

(…unless you are Ewan McGregor, Joaquin Phoenix or Viggo Mortensen…then, by all means, give us some luv darling!)

Ran across one of the funniest videos celebrating National Library Week called “Reference Desk.”

Yes, these questions all sound familiar! I think this guy comes in twice a week at our branch…

 

Check out all the others here: http://alfocus.blip.tv/posts?view=archive&nsfw=dc

 

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